Well now that the fog has cleared, I have some thoughts in my head about this season. Not much really, just some things floating around in my head and mostly confessions about myself.
Every year I have tried to tame the whole gift thing down. For friends and new aquainances I do a little basket of goodies that the kids and I put together.. not baking because then people have to eat it. Not that I'm bad at baking. I'm not. I'm also not proud ;)
This year I was very excited because I had so many things planned to do with the kids and up until leaving for Vancouver I was on the right track. But once home we were sick and I am still on the mend so everything went out the door. There are a few things that dissapoint me about Christmas.
#1. The focus is always on the gifts. I can't knock this too hard because I do the same thing. In fact this year when I didn't get the one thing that I really wanted I had to fight back tears and it ruined my whole night (we open gifts Christmas Eve night) I've bought less and less every year to try to get our minds off of the presents and focus more on Christ... but apparently this is not the solution.
#2. We are really boring, self centered parents. Pair that with being very sick and tired it's quite boring for my kids. I'm not the fun mom who plays with the kids toys with them. I sit there tired and doing nothing.
#3. Everyone else seems to have a lot more fun than us... probably because of the first two reasons.
Anyway it seems that my intentions always fly out the door every year and I become a beastly mother who is just no fun at all... the guilt comes in and by the end of the day I am a sobbing mess crumpled up in my bed being comforted by my husband.
Actually this is a fairly normal cycle in my life and doesn't just hold to Christmas alone.
Whew.. that was a vent and a half. Am I the only person who goes through this... I know why I do... it's just having the will power to do anything about it that's hard.... you?